Well....we did it. We pulled of Thanksgiving. I was amazed at how much work goes into getting ready. All of the food was awesome and thanks so much to everyone for making it wonderful feast! I think my parents were just amazed at the whole thing! The kids had a blast and were exhausted!
Emma is doing really well tonight! She was even chatting with me about Simon tonight while we were getting her ready for bed and not breaking down crying. She usually boohoohoos in the bathroom before bedtime for a while but I think she didn't cry at all. Having everyone here seems like it did her some good.
So...while we're gone....please feel free to call us if you have any questions. Try to remind her to get up and go the the restroom at least every three hours. If she sits longer than that, she sometimes leaks. Not to mention she is very stiff when she tries to get up.
Please also remember that she is diabetic. Yes...she takes medicine but that doesn't give her a free ride with sweets and carbs. We don't cut carbs out all together, but we certainly give them to her in moderation.
Her bedtime has been about 10. If you get her in the bathroom around 8:30, she's out by about 9:30 or 10. When she comes out, you need to encourage her to get ready for bed. She will resist and tell you she is not tired. But stick with it. Tell her she doesn't have to go to sleep but that she needs to get her pajamas on and get into bed. She will want to sleep in her chair, but her feet do so much better when she sleeps in the bed. Tell her that Trish the therapist wants her in bed and then change the subject. Plus, it is good exercise for her to get in and out of bed.
Her pills are all loaded up. Remember.....She has morning pills, dinner pills and bedtime pills. Please put them in a little cup and make sure she takes them from the cup. When she puts them in her hand, she often drops them. That is bad because she doesn't get her meds and we worry that the kids might find them and eat them off of the floor. Also watch that she does not poor her drink into the pill cup. It makes a mess of the pills! Sometimes you need to stand over her and make sure she takes them and doesn't pour water into them.
And last but not least....come visit Emma while we're gone and eat some left overs!!! There is still a bunch of food left over. There is pie in the fridge in the garage. So eat up!!!
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Monday, November 24, 2008
Just Before Thanksgiving
I hope everyone is well and getting excited for Thanksgiving. I know you are all probably headed into this holiday season with mixed emotions. I know it's going to be different this year but I am excited nonetheless! One of the many benefits of living at the house is the family gatherings. And now I get to have them where I live!!!!
The book 36 Hour Day came in and I have started it. Lots to read but I'm looking for tips on how to productively keep Emma on track. I'm sure you all know how stubborn she can be. Between Vic and I, we do pretty good getting her rounded up, but sometimes it seems unfair when we team up on her. So if there are better ways to convince her to get ready for bed, I'll hopefully find them in the book! I am also curious about the short term memory loss. She remembers SO much from so long ago. That is all etched deep into her memory. But it's the short term things that concern me. Nick gave her a very pretty scarf for her birthday. Several hours later I commented on how nice it was and she told me that RoseMary had given it to her. So I politely corrected her and then another hour later she made another comment (I think to Nick!) that RoseMary had given her the scarf. So that makes me wonder about her overall sense of time. More on that as I discover it.
I also want to let you all know that I made all of the siblings authors to this blog. So now you guys can add to the blog. Things you learn, think, feel...whatever. I'm not sure how many of you are reading this but hopefully it's helping keep everyone in touch with Emma. If it goes well, then perhaps we can open the postings up to grandchildren too. Nick had such a nice visit with her a week ago. It would be nice if he could share his insight. They took a pictorial trip to Italy. Emma really seemed to enjoy it. I took a trip down memory lane last night too. I wanted to show Peyton our wedding dvd. One of the sections is of the guys getting ready. It was so strange to see Simon. Right there! Like it was just yesterday. It still doesn't feel like he is gone. Probably because he isn't really gone. Just his body from this earth. But his spirit lives on. Anyway....it was good to see him. I let Emma watch too. She was sad and I asked her if it was ok to keep showing it. I told her I would turn it off it it was too sad. But she said she wanted it on. She commented that her hair looked nice!
Ok...I need to get back to work. See you all Thursday!!! Keep your eyes open for an email about coverage while we are in Disneyland.
The book 36 Hour Day came in and I have started it. Lots to read but I'm looking for tips on how to productively keep Emma on track. I'm sure you all know how stubborn she can be. Between Vic and I, we do pretty good getting her rounded up, but sometimes it seems unfair when we team up on her. So if there are better ways to convince her to get ready for bed, I'll hopefully find them in the book! I am also curious about the short term memory loss. She remembers SO much from so long ago. That is all etched deep into her memory. But it's the short term things that concern me. Nick gave her a very pretty scarf for her birthday. Several hours later I commented on how nice it was and she told me that RoseMary had given it to her. So I politely corrected her and then another hour later she made another comment (I think to Nick!) that RoseMary had given her the scarf. So that makes me wonder about her overall sense of time. More on that as I discover it.
I also want to let you all know that I made all of the siblings authors to this blog. So now you guys can add to the blog. Things you learn, think, feel...whatever. I'm not sure how many of you are reading this but hopefully it's helping keep everyone in touch with Emma. If it goes well, then perhaps we can open the postings up to grandchildren too. Nick had such a nice visit with her a week ago. It would be nice if he could share his insight. They took a pictorial trip to Italy. Emma really seemed to enjoy it. I took a trip down memory lane last night too. I wanted to show Peyton our wedding dvd. One of the sections is of the guys getting ready. It was so strange to see Simon. Right there! Like it was just yesterday. It still doesn't feel like he is gone. Probably because he isn't really gone. Just his body from this earth. But his spirit lives on. Anyway....it was good to see him. I let Emma watch too. She was sad and I asked her if it was ok to keep showing it. I told her I would turn it off it it was too sad. But she said she wanted it on. She commented that her hair looked nice!
Ok...I need to get back to work. See you all Thursday!!! Keep your eyes open for an email about coverage while we are in Disneyland.
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
More Updates from the Airport
Just a quick note before I head off for Vegas to attend the CDW Partner Summit. We had a nice weekend. Saturday we had chorizo and eggs for Emma's birthday. /RoseMary, Fred, Marisa, and the usual suspects from the compound. Yvonne stopped by with the kids and Nick spent some time with Emma on Sunday showing her pictures from his Italy trip. Pictures that were believed to have been lost but Gloria managed to find them.
Emma seems to dislike going to bed at night. We try to get her going early because it takes a while in the bathroom and so she can be up early to enjoy the day but she seems to be pushing it later and later. She said it is lonely in her room. I can totally understand that. But I have to say that a month ago when I would help her in bed, she could hardly get herself up there. But the other night, she seemed to be better able to mover herself into position. It just reinforces the fact that moving around is good for her. And that we can't make everything super easy for her for convenience. She doesn't like to move around so much but if you don't use it...you lose it! :-) We still have not been able to get her out. I hope to wheel her down to the park and/or Los Charros one of these days.
This Thursday we are going to the grief counselor. That should be good for everyone. I'm looking forward to an informative session and for more ideas on how to support Emma.
She has had a couple of peepee slips this week. So if we can all pitch in and help remind her to go to the bathroom, that would be great. Maybe she needs to go more often. Maybe if she goes more often, she won't spend so much time in there. My mom suggested we tell her doctor because she said that diabetes meds can sometimes make you have a weak bladder. So aside from the fact that she has had SEVEN kids, maybe there is some other medicine that can counteract the side effect of the diabetic meds to help incontinence. Just a thought.
Becky is working on getting more supplies from the medical store. We are also looking into nighttime underwear. It seems there are more accidents when she is laying down.
Emma seems to dislike going to bed at night. We try to get her going early because it takes a while in the bathroom and so she can be up early to enjoy the day but she seems to be pushing it later and later. She said it is lonely in her room. I can totally understand that. But I have to say that a month ago when I would help her in bed, she could hardly get herself up there. But the other night, she seemed to be better able to mover herself into position. It just reinforces the fact that moving around is good for her. And that we can't make everything super easy for her for convenience. She doesn't like to move around so much but if you don't use it...you lose it! :-) We still have not been able to get her out. I hope to wheel her down to the park and/or Los Charros one of these days.
This Thursday we are going to the grief counselor. That should be good for everyone. I'm looking forward to an informative session and for more ideas on how to support Emma.
She has had a couple of peepee slips this week. So if we can all pitch in and help remind her to go to the bathroom, that would be great. Maybe she needs to go more often. Maybe if she goes more often, she won't spend so much time in there. My mom suggested we tell her doctor because she said that diabetes meds can sometimes make you have a weak bladder. So aside from the fact that she has had SEVEN kids, maybe there is some other medicine that can counteract the side effect of the diabetic meds to help incontinence. Just a thought.
Becky is working on getting more supplies from the medical store. We are also looking into nighttime underwear. It seems there are more accidents when she is laying down.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Airport Blogging
As hard as we tried, we just couldn't get Emma to join us at the Spagthetti Factory for Nick's birthday dinner last night. But Ric DID get her down the the Grief Counseling center and Emma met with a grief counselor. I will let Ric comment more but the gist I got was that Emma is about where she needs to be. Considering her dimentia and the number of year she was happily married, she's sad. Nothing unusual about that. Ric has recommended that we all check out a book called 36 Hour. I just ordered it used off of Amazon. I'll leave it at the house if anyone wants to check it out.
Ric also mentioned that the grief counselor would be happy to meet with Emma and her children (and maybe me too since I'm living with her). She doesn't usually work in the evenings, but to accomdate everyone's schedule, she said she would be willing to do an early evening appt on a Thursday. Next Thursday the 20th is a possibility and Ric is going to check to see if we could try for Tuesday the 25. So RoseMary, Lydia, Robert, Ric, Gloria, Becky and Victor...check your calendars. :-)
As you all know, her birthday is Thursday. Gloria has an email out looking for ideas on what to do. I am in Chicago on Thursday but would love it if we could have folks over on Saturday or Sunday. Again, Emma could use some nice cozy pajama gowns in size 1x. Lydia also mentioned that she could use some new log sleeved tops/sweaters in a 1x. It's probably time to sort through her closet and pack away some summer clothes and make the winter cothes easier to access if anyone is so inclined.
Ric also mentioned that the grief counselor would be happy to meet with Emma and her children (and maybe me too since I'm living with her). She doesn't usually work in the evenings, but to accomdate everyone's schedule, she said she would be willing to do an early evening appt on a Thursday. Next Thursday the 20th is a possibility and Ric is going to check to see if we could try for Tuesday the 25. So RoseMary, Lydia, Robert, Ric, Gloria, Becky and Victor...check your calendars. :-)
As you all know, her birthday is Thursday. Gloria has an email out looking for ideas on what to do. I am in Chicago on Thursday but would love it if we could have folks over on Saturday or Sunday. Again, Emma could use some nice cozy pajama gowns in size 1x. Lydia also mentioned that she could use some new log sleeved tops/sweaters in a 1x. It's probably time to sort through her closet and pack away some summer clothes and make the winter cothes easier to access if anyone is so inclined.
Sunday, November 9, 2008
Happy Birthday Nick!
I took off Friday night with the kids to go to Salinas so I wasn't around on Saturday. But I know that RoseMary came and spent a few hours and then Ric and Sabrina came by. Vic went to Marina to race at the BMWCCA Top Driver Shoot out and he won! Congrats Vic! Now if we can just find room for the big trophy!
Emma seems to be doing ok. She is pretty sad tonight. I hate giving her a Zanax but they seem to help. I saw on the calendar that she has some Grief Counseling appointment on Tuesday. So I'm excited to see how that goes.
She has also been complaining about her knee. So hopefully Becky at some point can see about getting her a shot.
She also sometimes complains about her ears. Says that she's probably losing more hearing. Not sure if this is something to have checked out but worth noting.
As I'm sure you all know, her birthday is this Thursday. I'm sure it will be difficult trying to celebrate her first birthday without Simon. :-( Hopefully we can all do something this weekend to celebrate Nick and Emma's birthday.
I'll be in Chicago this week. Leave Wednesday and return Friday morning. I got the two trips mixed up on the calendar. I go to Vegas the following week.
The last thing is that I think she might need a few new nice flannel night gowns. A few of the ones she has are getting a bit worn and have some stains on them. She seems to like the flannel ones because they keep her warm. So perhaps someone can get her a few new ones?
Ok...off to get Emma in the bathroom so we can get her ready for bed. Peyton also needs to get his jammies on and get to bed ASAP!
Emma seems to be doing ok. She is pretty sad tonight. I hate giving her a Zanax but they seem to help. I saw on the calendar that she has some Grief Counseling appointment on Tuesday. So I'm excited to see how that goes.
She has also been complaining about her knee. So hopefully Becky at some point can see about getting her a shot.
She also sometimes complains about her ears. Says that she's probably losing more hearing. Not sure if this is something to have checked out but worth noting.
As I'm sure you all know, her birthday is this Thursday. I'm sure it will be difficult trying to celebrate her first birthday without Simon. :-( Hopefully we can all do something this weekend to celebrate Nick and Emma's birthday.
I'll be in Chicago this week. Leave Wednesday and return Friday morning. I got the two trips mixed up on the calendar. I go to Vegas the following week.
The last thing is that I think she might need a few new nice flannel night gowns. A few of the ones she has are getting a bit worn and have some stains on them. She seems to like the flannel ones because they keep her warm. So perhaps someone can get her a few new ones?
Ok...off to get Emma in the bathroom so we can get her ready for bed. Peyton also needs to get his jammies on and get to bed ASAP!
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Second Blog-For the Three Followers So Far
Not too much to report today. I came home early so I could do a 5 pm meeting from the office here at home. Emma is visiting with Cindy in the living room.
Last night was a good night. Emma really wanted to sit in her chair in her room after coming out of the bathroom. We know that if we don't get her in bed by 9 or 9:30 that she'll be up too late. I was worried after the last two mornings that maybe if we get her to bed too early, she'll wake up earlier and that's when she tries to get up and could take a spill. But she and I had a discussion in the middle or her room and finally she started putting her pajamas on and I got her in bed. I learned some new techniques from the physical therapist on how to help her and guide her on to the bed. So that worked well.
I was running late this morning but when I peeked in on her a little after 8, she was still sleeping like a baby! No reports from Vic today on how the morning went but at least she wasn't up before 7 and ending up on the floor today!
Last night was a good night. Emma really wanted to sit in her chair in her room after coming out of the bathroom. We know that if we don't get her in bed by 9 or 9:30 that she'll be up too late. I was worried after the last two mornings that maybe if we get her to bed too early, she'll wake up earlier and that's when she tries to get up and could take a spill. But she and I had a discussion in the middle or her room and finally she started putting her pajamas on and I got her in bed. I learned some new techniques from the physical therapist on how to help her and guide her on to the bed. So that worked well.
I was running late this morning but when I peeked in on her a little after 8, she was still sleeping like a baby! No reports from Vic today on how the morning went but at least she wasn't up before 7 and ending up on the floor today!
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
First Blog Post for Emma
I decided to start a blog to help keep the family updated on life at "The Compound." Emma has her good days and bad and it would be great if you all could keep updated. Some days I'll be able to write a lot and sometimes I'll get busy and won't be able to keep track so bear with me. If you want, be sure to subscribe to the blog and you'll get updated on when I post.
Our first week in the house seems to have gone well. Aside from the fact that there is too much stuff and not enough room, but we'll work through that. I also feel like a bull in a china shop. I have the dropsies, I am constantly knocking things over and bumping into things. Bruises everywhere!
Emma seemed to be doing well for our first week. We are working to get her on a consistent schedule which works out well since we aim to to the same for the kids too. We're working to have dinner around 6. We try to get her into the bathroom around 8 and ask her to get her jammies on by 9. The physical therapist has recommended that she sleep in bed and she did really well with that all week. She is usually asleep by around 10.
She has been taking her meds in the morning and at night with some tea and toast. She has been falling asleep and spilling her tea in bed so we decided to make a slight change. We now have a container with pills that she takes in the morning with breakfast. Then we another container for pills that she takes with food at dinner. Then we have a final container for pills to help her sleep that she will take around 9:30 so she can be asleep by 10.
Fina and Diane came to visit her on Saturday. They brought her a birthday gift and visited with her for a while.
Sunday night Emma was in the bathroom before bedtime and put out an SOS to RoseMary via the phone in there. Poor RoseMary didn't have Victor's number so she drove over to see what was going on. Emma was a little more upset than normal but she was fine. She called RoseMary again last night and was a little more upset than normal. So we called Becky and she told us where the Xanax is. We gave Emma a Xanax to help settle her down. I hate to give her the Xanax and only want to do so when she seems extremely upset. Ric is in the process of researching some help for her. Either getting her back into Oats or maybe getting her down to the Center for Living With Dying. We'll keep you posted.
On Monday morning and this morning Emma went down. She did not fall, she just slid to the floor and could not get up. I think the time change is effecting her because she usually gets up around 8 when we are up and about and can check on her. But the last two mornings, she has gotten out of bed on her own around 7. So we are going to get a monitor (either for sound only or perhaps even a video monit0r) so that we can hear when she starts moving about. Also, that way she can call for help and we'll be able to clearly hear her when we are in other parts of the house.
The other thing I want to make sure you all know about is the binder. One of the 3 therapists who have been coming by the house for the past month has set up a binder. This is to help Emma keep track of time and activities. Every day she can see what is going on, she can cross off the day and be aware of what the next day is. She also has a checklist to track when she eats, goes potty, takes her pills, etc. So if you're ever here for a visit, feel free to review her binder with her.
Another update is that she has a new chair. Becky and Craig went out and picked up a nice LazyBoy chair. This one smells nice and fresh, it is more upright which is better for her posture and it does not rock which helps her get in and out. She thinks it's ok but says the other one was more comfy.
The foot Dr. also recommended some new shoes. So Lydia went out and bought her a nice new pair. She still has her Crocs to wear around the house. The Crocs are good in case of accidents-they clean up easily.
The physical therapist is here now trying to help us figure out how she went down. Emma's knee has been bothering her so maybe I'll talk to Becky about getting Emma in for another cortisone shot. Emma is on the bed doing her exercises and Cindy is supervising.
That's all for today! More to come!
Our first week in the house seems to have gone well. Aside from the fact that there is too much stuff and not enough room, but we'll work through that. I also feel like a bull in a china shop. I have the dropsies, I am constantly knocking things over and bumping into things. Bruises everywhere!
Emma seemed to be doing well for our first week. We are working to get her on a consistent schedule which works out well since we aim to to the same for the kids too. We're working to have dinner around 6. We try to get her into the bathroom around 8 and ask her to get her jammies on by 9. The physical therapist has recommended that she sleep in bed and she did really well with that all week. She is usually asleep by around 10.
She has been taking her meds in the morning and at night with some tea and toast. She has been falling asleep and spilling her tea in bed so we decided to make a slight change. We now have a container with pills that she takes in the morning with breakfast. Then we another container for pills that she takes with food at dinner. Then we have a final container for pills to help her sleep that she will take around 9:30 so she can be asleep by 10.
Fina and Diane came to visit her on Saturday. They brought her a birthday gift and visited with her for a while.
Sunday night Emma was in the bathroom before bedtime and put out an SOS to RoseMary via the phone in there. Poor RoseMary didn't have Victor's number so she drove over to see what was going on. Emma was a little more upset than normal but she was fine. She called RoseMary again last night and was a little more upset than normal. So we called Becky and she told us where the Xanax is. We gave Emma a Xanax to help settle her down. I hate to give her the Xanax and only want to do so when she seems extremely upset. Ric is in the process of researching some help for her. Either getting her back into Oats or maybe getting her down to the Center for Living With Dying. We'll keep you posted.
On Monday morning and this morning Emma went down. She did not fall, she just slid to the floor and could not get up. I think the time change is effecting her because she usually gets up around 8 when we are up and about and can check on her. But the last two mornings, she has gotten out of bed on her own around 7. So we are going to get a monitor (either for sound only or perhaps even a video monit0r) so that we can hear when she starts moving about. Also, that way she can call for help and we'll be able to clearly hear her when we are in other parts of the house.
The other thing I want to make sure you all know about is the binder. One of the 3 therapists who have been coming by the house for the past month has set up a binder. This is to help Emma keep track of time and activities. Every day she can see what is going on, she can cross off the day and be aware of what the next day is. She also has a checklist to track when she eats, goes potty, takes her pills, etc. So if you're ever here for a visit, feel free to review her binder with her.
Another update is that she has a new chair. Becky and Craig went out and picked up a nice LazyBoy chair. This one smells nice and fresh, it is more upright which is better for her posture and it does not rock which helps her get in and out. She thinks it's ok but says the other one was more comfy.
The foot Dr. also recommended some new shoes. So Lydia went out and bought her a nice new pair. She still has her Crocs to wear around the house. The Crocs are good in case of accidents-they clean up easily.
The physical therapist is here now trying to help us figure out how she went down. Emma's knee has been bothering her so maybe I'll talk to Becky about getting Emma in for another cortisone shot. Emma is on the bed doing her exercises and Cindy is supervising.
That's all for today! More to come!
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